Friday, August 18, 2006

bah hum

soo . . . I'm a little frustrated with the world... my immediate sphere of influence to be exact. I know who I think I am, but in reality it doesn't ever seem to add up. It seems I'm always one step behind. I don't really know how to change it, and I don't necessarily want to accept it. I don't think I'm content, but I really don't think I'm complacent. Is there a medium? I know 1 Timothy 6:6 a hundred times over. But the only gain I ever seem to experience is weight. I do have joy... it just seems shallow. And sporadic. I want the joy of the Lord. I want to be filled with it so much so that nothing else matters... unlike now where it seems everything else matters but the joy of the Lord.

We delivered T-Pup's cute little birthday invitations today. I'm excited about his party but a little nervous too... I'm making the cakes so I feel a little pressured. I really wanted his party to be small and intimate, and it's going to be the opposite. Many people. The thought of living in a town where we 2 or 3 people is actually appealing to me... wild, I know. On the flip side I enjoy all of the family here. I've never really experienced it before, so it's a blessing.

We are going to the high school football game tonight... first of the season. I'm looking forward to it. I've tried on 10 different outfits and none fit my current mood... I'm such a girl.

2 comments:

whitney said...

i hope you had a great time last night

megan stout said...

im choosing to not think about that comment by whitney and proceed with my original train of thought...
michelle! you started writing! yay! i love you and i need to see you soon pleaseeeeee!